Mental Health Swims - My First Hosted Open Water Swim

About a fortnight ago, the Mental Health Swims (MHS) account followed me on Instagram, and within moments I was shooting the Founder, Rachel, a DM.

I couldn’t believe that I was seeing a model that was a mirror refection of Run Talk Run (RTR) but for open water swimming. The premise and goal is the same - facilitate a safe space where people can turn up entirely as themselves, whether they are happy, sad, anxious or meh. Normalising mental health conversation at the forefront, with an activity as a secondary bonus feature. RTR for running, MHS for swimming.

Unlike RTRs weekly regularity, MHS meet to swim just once a month which lowered the barrier to participation and hosting, since I wasn’t entirely sure that I could commit to a weekly swim. Fast forward about a week or so, and Rachel and I are chatting endlessly over the phone about our dreams and plans for both RTR and MHS.

I answered some of her questions about what it takes to scale such a beastly support community. We talked about the boring Health & Safety stuff, the logistical sign-up process stuff, and then we bonded over the emotional labour that we pour into these communities and the need for boundaries. If I wanted Rachel to come away with anything, it was to know that the boundaries she puts in place now will be the very lines with which she’ll save herself when MHS undoubtedly scales into something even more magnificent than what it is today.

So how was that first swim?

SCARY.

I have to admit that over the last 3 years I’ve developed a pretty solid routine around my RTRs that make them easier to navigate as a leader. What I mean by this, is that my confidence has grown.

Hosting this MHS for the first time, however, had me swimming in discomfort in the days prior… what would I say? What if a really competent swimmer turned up and I couldn’t facilitate their needs? What if my social anxiety flared up and I lost all communication skills in an instant? What if they could smell the sadness on me, and it was all too much?

It was like I’d been thrown back 3 years and I felt a wave of empathy for all the new RTR Leaders who show up to their runs in the first few weeks so deeply unsure of their right to be a “running leader”.

In the end, it was just my mum and boyfriend who came along for the dip and so any social pressure was alleviated immediately. I also massively messed up with tide times and so I felt incredible gratitude for the fact no strangers had seen this cock up!

So between Jake, my mum and I, we splashed in the shallow rock pools and slipped around on the seaweed and laughed at each other as we fell into deeper parts of the sea unexpectedly. We didn’t talk mental health…. but I could bring my most “Jess self” there and that was special.

Instead of hosting these monthly I think I’m going to hold them weekly. I want to build my confidence with open water swimming, and I want to build my confidence in facilitating a support group outside the realms of RTR too.

The world deserves mental health support that is accessible, and less intimidating than sitting in a circle raising our hands to share what little parts of sadness we can bare to expose. It’s up to us, your Average Joe’s, to make sure we are creating spaces where talking about your mental health is just so normal.

I think this is what I care about more than anything in the world… the running and the swimming… they’re just a lovely little bonus.

Join me next Sunday @ Holywell Toilets. Time to be confirmed - I’ll post it to my Instagram @jessicamaryrobson

HOW TO MOTIVATE YOURSELF TO RUN WHEN YOU REALLY DON’T WANT TO

Whether depression/anxiety impacts your sleep or not, it is not uncommon to wake up in the morning with very little (or no) will to get out of bed and do not only what is expected of you (like, you know, going to work) let alone to get up and do MORE than what is expected of you – to put your body through its paces.

Despite running and strength training being the biggest relief and escape from a negative mindset, sometimes I can forget just how beneficial it is for me to get moving. Depression particularly is incredibly numbing; the implications of my thoughts rendering my body almost stuck to the spot.

For me, self-doubt often plays a huge role in telling me not to bother. I struggle with the concept of not being a “good enough” runner, or a “strong enough” girl to be squatting/deadlifting and using up valuable squat-rack space at the gym. But, as is plainly obvious, if I had that mentality ALL of the time then I would NEVER get any faster or any stronger. There is very little logic that passes through a depressed mind when it is determined to self-sabotage.

SOMEHOW, I still make it out of bed at 5am, 5 days out of 7. How?

1. I Sleep in my Gym/Running Clothes

HA, the boyfriend doesn’t know this one but when I’m not at his, I often sleep in my sports bra and running leggings. Why? Because that leaves me with very little choice in the morning. In fact, it would be more effort to get changed out of those clothes and into something else than it would to just go (again, little logic involved but it works). In sleeping in comfortable workout-wear I’ve taken away half the battle already by consuming less valuable time getting ready to go.

In addition to this, I make sure everything is lined up in a neat pile ready for me to grab and go. My water, my bag of work clothes, coat, oyster, everything. If I have to spend too much time dawdling getting myself together, chances are I’ll talk myself out of it.

2. “Just One Mile”

When I don’t feel I have the energy to commit to the planned 10k (or even 5k), I try and reason with myself a little. I refer back to the idea that 10 minutes running is better than 0 minutes running, and that I should just do a mile anyway. Well, for me, the first mile is always the hardest and by the time my legs have warmed up I WANT the extra miles.

The same applies to the gym. If I make the whole experience less daunting (e.g. “stick to light weights/low reps today Jess”) then I’m gonna feel less intimidated by the energy required of me. Again, when I reach the gym, I feel proud for having made it there and my drive returns to give the workout 100% anyway.

3. Routine

I cannot stand not knowing where I’m going to be and when, routine is VITAL to my workout-week (and mental wellbeing generally), and without it I probably wouldn’t run or gym at all.

Through planning the week ahead on a Sunday evening I take out the “brain power” involved upon waking, deciding a) where I’m running to, b) what kind of pace I’m aiming for. Having my workouts planned has helped tremendously in taking out the guess work of each workout.

4. Join a Running Group

Shameless plug (and desperation for fellow runners!). In all seriousness, having accountability in a running buddy or workout partner is paramount to getting the work done sometimes. Paranoia that you’re letting down a team of people may actually work to your benefit in this instance… of course you’ll turn up if you said you would, right?

(we meet every Thursday – see the events page for more details)

5. Use the Negative as a Motivator

This, to me is a last port of call, HOWEVER, reminding myself of the shame and guilt I feel through not working out actually works very well in getting my feet into my trainers. Its the classic phrase that we all know “the only workout you’ll regret is the one you didn’t do”. It is very true though. I give myself a really hard time when I miss a workout so I know that however dreadful I feel about getting to the gym, or on the road, I’ll feel even more dreadful if I don’t. Rightly or wrongly, this is the truth and you can use it to your advantage sometimes.

Pop me a message if you have any further tips that you think could be added or if you simply fancy a chat. You can do so here.